Browse Through Our Collection of 5,191 Chuck Norris Jokes
Browse through our full list of Chuck Norris Facts...
(listed from oldest to newest)
When Chuck Norris gets shot, the bullet doesn't pierce Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris gets Pierce Brosnan.
Rated 3.05/5 (20 Votes)
Chuck Norris plays Whack-a-Mole with his feet.
Rated 2.79/5 (28 Votes)
Before Chuck Norris was born, the martial arts weapon with two wooden rods attached to a chain was originally called a nunbarry. nobody knew what happened to barry.
Rated 4.04/5 (23 Votes)
Chuck Norris scared the Swine Flu out of pigs, that is the reason it now is infecting humans.
Rated 3.95/5 (20 Votes)
Chuck Norris is the reason cicadas come out only once every 17 years.
Rated 3.55/5 (11 Votes)
Chuck Norris bit the apple logo.
Rated 3.91/5 (23 Votes)
Chuck Norris shushes the librarian.
Rated 4.08/5 (37 Votes)
Chuck Norris doesn't mow his lawn. He just stares at the grass and dares it to grow.
Rated 4.08/5 (24 Votes)
What's the difference between an atomic bomb and Chuck Norris? .......You really need me to answer that?
Rated 3.14/5 (14 Votes)
Chuck Norris is so tough, he masturbates with sand paper.
Rated 3.68/5 (22 Votes)
Chuck Norris shits out nuclear bombs.
Rated 2.47/5 (17 Votes)
Chuck Norris can only see one color; red from the blood of his victims.
Rated 3.5/5 (10 Votes)
There is no such thing as an atom bomb. its actually just Chuck Norris dressed up.
Rated 2.71/5 (14 Votes)
It wasn't a meteor that killed all of the dinosaurs. It was actually Chuck Norris falling from the sky.
Rated 3.7/5 (27 Votes)
Chuck Norris will never run for President of the United States. It would be a demotion.
Rated 3.83/5 (18 Votes)
The USA really lost the Vietnam War when Chuck Norris went M.I.A.
Rated 2.67/5 (12 Votes)
Chuck Norris CAN take the foot out of Joe Biden's mouth.
Rated 3.3/5 (10 Votes)
When Chuck Norris breaks wind, he actually takes the wind in his fists and BREAKS it.
Rated 3.94/5 (18 Votes)
Chuck Norris has more force than the force.
Rated 2.42/5 (12 Votes)
Chuck Norris put humpty dumpty back together and broke him again.
Rated 3.17/5 (12 Votes)