Browse Through Our Collection of 5,191 Chuck Norris Jokes
Browse through our full list of Chuck Norris Facts...
(listed from oldest to newest)
When Chuck Norris works out he doesn't get stronger, the machine does.
Rated 3.66/5 (29 Votes)
The judges of American idol sing for Chuck Norris.
Rated 2.75/5 (12 Votes)
The Titans remember Chuck Norris.
Rated 3.65/5 (20 Votes)
Chuck Norris can erase permanent marker.
Rated 4.08/5 (77 Votes)
If Chuck Norris has 10 bananas, and you take away 7, he still has 10.
Rated 3.97/5 (29 Votes)
Bravery is not the absence of fear, it is the absence of Chuck Norris.
Rated 3.36/5 (25 Votes)
The videos of global warming's effect on glaciers is caused by Chuck Norris staring at them.
Rated 2.7/5 (20 Votes)
If you slide a picture of Chuck Norris into an ATM, money falls out automatically.
Rated 3.32/5 (25 Votes)
The best way to prevent hyperinflation is not basing currency on the gold standard. Preventing hyperinflation is best done by basing currency on the Chuck Norris standard.
Rated 2.42/5 (12 Votes)
Chuck Norris ran so fast around the world, that he ran into himself.
Rated 3.3/5 (20 Votes)
Chuck Norris makes money grow on trees.
Rated 3/5 (17 Votes)
What would Chuck Norris do for a klondike bar? Nothing... and still get one.
Rated 4/5 (18 Votes)
Lightning does not strike Chuck Norris. It respectfully asks permission to touch him.
Rated 3.81/5 (21 Votes)
Chuck Norris gets 7 shots out of a revolver.
Rated 3.9/5 (21 Votes)
Chuck Norris can unring a bell.
Rated 3.78/5 (23 Votes)
Chuck Norris can pump up a basket ball with a straw, with his lips tied behind his back.
Rated 3.58/5 (24 Votes)
Chuck Norris' pencils sharpen themselves.
Rated 2.83/5 (12 Votes)
Chuck Norris only skydived once, he thought the United States only needed one Grand Canyon.
Rated 3.89/5 (28 Votes)
When Chuck Norris breaks wind it can't be fixed.
Rated 3.42/5 (19 Votes)
Chuck Norris doesn't breath air. He holds air hostage.
Rated 3.96/5 (28 Votes)