Browse Through Our Collection of 5,191 Chuck Norris Jokes
Browse through our full list of Chuck Norris Facts...
(listed from oldest to newest)
UFO'S are defined as the indescribable, blurred image you get before a deadly Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to the cranium!!
Rated 2/5 (21 Votes)
Chuck Norris can say "TOYBOAT" fast five times without messing up!
Rated 2.4/5 (25 Votes)
The Hoover Dam was built for Chuck Norris's swimming pool!
Rated 2.21/5 (19 Votes)
Chuck Norris never, ever loses a sock when he does laundry! Cause the only washing he does is when he agitates your face with a triple roundhouse kick!
Rated 2.12/5 (25 Votes)
If Chuck Norris put on makeup, a wig, and a dress, YOU'D be gay.
Rated 3.11/5 (27 Votes)
If you look directly at Chuck Norris, you will go blind. Consequently, if you make eye contact with Chuck Norris you have 24 hours to live.
Rated 2.72/5 (18 Votes)
Chuck didn't leave anything to Beaver.
Rated 3.18/5 (22 Votes)
Cavemen are more scared of Chuck Norris than GEICO.
Rated 2.79/5 (14 Votes)
Chuck Norris pisses on eletric fences for fun.
Rated 2.5/5 (16 Votes)
When Chuck Norris wears a seat belt its for the cars protection.
Rated 3.57/5 (30 Votes)
Chuck Norris wakes up his alarm clock.
Rated 3.13/5 (32 Votes)
Chuck Norris once killed a man with a roundhouse kick to someone else's face.
Rated 3.62/5 (34 Votes)
Chuck Norris can punch you with a roundhouse kick.
Rated 2.84/5 (25 Votes)
Chuck Norris can see air.
Rated 3.26/5 (23 Votes)
Chuck Norris can see with his eyes closed.
Rated 2.65/5 (26 Votes)
Chuck Norris can make a gay person straight.
Rated 2.14/5 (21 Votes)
Wilt Chamberlain claimed to have make love to over 20,000 women in his life...thats a slow tuesday 4 Chuck Norris.
Rated 3.27/5 (26 Votes)
CHuck Norris can make Superman bleed just by flexing his muscles.
Rated 3.15/5 (27 Votes)
Chuck Norris is God's witness.
Rated 2.25/5 (28 Votes)
Chuck Norris uses king crab legs for toilet paper.
Rated 2.48/5 (23 Votes)