Browse Through Our Collection of 5,191 Chuck Norris Jokes
Browse through our full list of Chuck Norris Facts...
(listed from oldest to newest)
When good and evil are fighting... Chuck Norris breaks it up.
Rated 3.87/5 (31 Votes)
Chuck Norris eats stars and craps black holes.
Rated 3.46/5 (13 Votes)
Superman gets power from the sun, Chuck Norris gets his power from his f-in beard!
Rated 2.45/5 (11 Votes)
Chuck Norris has won every beard contest in the world with out even going.
Rated 3.88/5 (16 Votes)
Anti-venom is actually Chuck Norris sweat.
Rated 3.58/5 (12 Votes)
Once a man had a dream about Chuck Norris and woke up with a black eye!
Rated 3.55/5 (11 Votes)
Chuck Norris once put out a house fire with his spit!!
Rated 2.7/5 (10 Votes)
Chuck Norris practices Chuckkwondo becuase Taekwondo implies that a fight ends in a draw.
Rated 3.73/5 (83 Votes)
Chuck Norris puts his pants on three legs at a time.
Rated 3.33/5 (12 Votes)
The reson why the sun is so hot is because Chuck Norris has a house on it and he left the heater on.
Rated 3.58/5 (12 Votes)
Chuck Norris was sitting around a campfire with two cowboys. the cowboys were competing to see which one is more hardcore. the first one says," Once, I was charged by an angry bull. I proceeded to jump on its back and kill it by gorging its eyes out."
The second says, “Once I was swimming in a river, and an anaconda tried to strangle me. I ripped its head off with my teeth."
Chuck Norris just smiles paying little attention and continues tending to the campfire with his penis.
Rated 3.58/5 (24 Votes)
MacGyver can build an airplane out of gum and paper clips, but Chuck Norris can kill him and take it.
Rated 2.63/5 (8 Votes)
Chuck Norris can squeeze a magnet so hard that its molecules allign.
Rated 3.5/5 (18 Votes)
Chuck Norris invented IED's to brush his teeth in the morning.
Rated 2.4/5 (10 Votes)
Mormons dont Knock on Chuck Norris's door.
Rated 3.23/5 (13 Votes)
Chuck Norris is a great amature magician, he doesn't take your nose tho he takes your teeth.
Rated 2.89/5 (9 Votes)
The Rock Smells what the Chuck is cooking.
Rated 2.6/5 (10 Votes)
Chuck Norris is so cool when his child was born the doctor said "Ice ice baby".
Rated 1.8/5 (10 Votes)
Chuck Norris is so cool he made Global Warming freeze.
Rated 2.54/5 (13 Votes)
Chuck Norris can own a Canadian.
Rated 2.23/5 (13 Votes)