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Chuck Norris once lit one of his farts. The orbit of the Earth has changed by 150 miles.

Rated 3/5 (6 Votes)

Chuck Norris on poverty: "Let them eat boot.".

Rated 2.22/5 (9 Votes)

Chuck Norris' house is actually a sphere.

Rated 2.22/5 (9 Votes)

Chuck Norris can be walking down the street butt naked, and still get arrsted for carrying a lethal weapon.

Rated 4.05/5 (40 Votes)

When Chuck Norris stares at you, his eyes roundhouse kick your soul.

Rated 3.24/5 (21 Votes)

When Chuck Norris took the third block out of the bottom of an Jenga tower it stayed standing.

Rated 2.29/5 (7 Votes)

There used to be a band called 'The Peas', but after Chuck Norris came around, they are now called 'The Black-Eyed Peas'!

Rated 3.06/5 (16 Votes)

Chuck Norris is the only human capable of reproducing A-sexually. They have 47 kids.

Rated 3.09/5 (11 Votes)

People invented the automobile to get away from Chuck Norris. Not to be outdone, Chuck Norris invented the automobile accident.

Rated 3.33/5 (9 Votes)

Johnny and the devil had a fiddle showdown. Chuck Norris won.

Rated 3.25/5 (12 Votes)

Geico saved a bunch of money on car insurance by switching to Chuck Norris.

Rated 3.18/5 (11 Votes)

The reason why Chuck Norris uses guns is because he's holding back.

Rated 3.36/5 (11 Votes)

Chuck Norris can get brain freeze drinking coffee.

Rated 1.64/5 (14 Votes)

Chuck Norris has never won a fair fight never, because no fight with Chuck Norris is fair.

Rated 2.27/5 (11 Votes)

Chuck Norris knows the meaning of life, he just doesn't want to tell you.

Rated 4.07/5 (15 Votes)

Chuck Norris' favorite snack is pistols.

Rated 3.67/5 (6 Votes)

God told Noah to build the arc when Chuck Norris told God he was going for a swim.

Rated 2.33/5 (12 Votes)

Chuck Norris can teach a dead dog new tricks.

Rated 3.43/5 (14 Votes)

Compared to Chuck Norris, John Holmes was Asian.

Rated 2.2/5 (10 Votes)

Heights are afraid of Chuck Norris.

Rated 3.9/5 (10 Votes)
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