Browse Through Our Collection of 5,191 Chuck Norris Jokes
Browse through our full list of Chuck Norris Facts...
(listed from oldest to newest)
Hubble Space telescope broke because it saw Chuck Norris.
Rated 2.75/5 (8 Votes)
Chuck Norris can shock electricity.
Rated 4/5 (19 Votes)
FDR said "the only thing we have to fear is fear itself." The original words were "the only thing we have to fear is Chuck Norris," but he was too afraid to say it.
Rated 3.94/5 (18 Votes)
Chuck Norris once had parkinsons, but he shook it off.
Rated 3.76/5 (17 Votes)
Chuck Norris doesn't use condoms, he uses blast shields.
Rated 3.35/5 (17 Votes)
Chuck Norris has found the end of a rainbow and roundhouse kicked the lepricorn.
Rated 3.32/5 (19 Votes)
Chuck Norris can sing through his belt.
Rated 2.58/5 (12 Votes)
Chuck Norris gives ciggerretts lung cancer.
Rated 3.69/5 (26 Votes)
Chuck Norris gives beer a hangover.
Rated 4/5 (16 Votes)
Chuck Norris never dances around a question. Questions dance around Chuck Norris.
Rated 2.56/5 (16 Votes)
Chuck Norris once blinked...the average age of death for an American increased by. 03 seconds.
Rated 3.55/5 (11 Votes)
Chuck Norris doesn't breathe. He holds air hostage.
Rated 3.82/5 (17 Votes)
Most people have web sites. Chuck Norris has killing sites.
Rated 3.1/5 (10 Votes)
The only reason bigfoot is hiding is because he stole Chuck Norris' body hair.
Rated 3.08/5 (13 Votes)
Chuck Norris doesn't use his beard to shave he only uses it to sharpen his blades.
Rated 3.42/5 (19 Votes)
Chuck Norris does NOT look like a fool with his pants on the ground.
Rated 3.43/5 (21 Votes)
Chuck Norris is not allowed on tv because nobody has the balls to censor him.
Rated 3.07/5 (15 Votes)
Chuck Norris is so smart, it makes bill Gates look dumb.
Rated 2.82/5 (17 Votes)
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him across.
Rated 3.12/5 (17 Votes)
Chuck Norris can win a game of tic-tac-toe in two moves.
Rated 3.62/5 (21 Votes)