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Chuck Norris can hear a silent fart.

Rated 3.32/5 (19 Votes)

Chuck Norris can tune a piano AND tuna fish.

Rated 2.14/5 (106 Votes)

Chuck Norris can beat the masterhand in a thumb wrestle.

Rated 2.96/5 (47 Votes)

Chuck Norris once beat a boy named Jimmy to death with his own skull. A lot of people don't think that's not physically possible. Well that's exactly what Jimmy kept screaming.

Rated 3.27/5 (22 Votes)

In the dictionary, there is a picture of Chuck Norris wearing a bulletproof vest next to the word "redundant".

Rated 3.69/5 (16 Votes)

Superman is able to leap tall buildings in a single bound. Chuck Norris can walk straight through tall buildings. And Superman.

Rated 3.87/5 (23 Votes)

Chuck Norris doesn't believe in idioms. So when he says that he's killing time, he's literally ending its existence.

Rated 3.32/5 (19 Votes)

Everyone who wakes up on Christmas morning gets a Christmas present from Chuck Norris. The fact that they are allowed to wake up on Christmas morning.

Rated 4.08/5 (26 Votes)

They tried to carve Chuck Norris's head into Mount Rushmore, but the granite wasn't hard enough for his beard.

Rated 3.76/5 (21 Votes)

Chuck Norris doesn't negotiate with terrorists, they negotiate with him.

Rated 3.53/5 (19 Votes)

Saying "Chuck Norris" after your opponent says "Check Mate" in the game of Chess, instantly makes you the winner.

Rated 4.09/5 (35 Votes)

Chuck Norris can't wear socks because they are afraid of his mighty kicks.

Rated 3.26/5 (19 Votes)

Chuck Norris can creat fire by just rubbing his hands together.

Rated 2.93/5 (15 Votes)

Chuck Norris once climbed Mout Everest.. in speedos.

Rated 3.59/5 (17 Votes)

I once had a fight with Chuck Norris. Within three second he had twisted me into an animal balloon.

Rated 2.65/5 (17 Votes)

Chuck Norris one played a game of pool and sunk every ball in one shot using a toothpick.

Rated 2.92/5 (13 Votes)

Chuck Norris`s car is powered by his aura.

Rated 3/5 (13 Votes)

As a party joke. Chuck Norris turns people inside out.

Rated 2.88/5 (8 Votes)

Chuck Norris gives the sun sun stroke.

Rated 3.75/5 (24 Votes)

Chuck Norris doesn't produce sperm. He produces little white ninjas that only have one mission...Search and Destroy.

Rated 3.92/5 (26 Votes)
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