Browse Through Our Collection of 5,191 Chuck Norris Jokes
Browse through our full list of Chuck Norris Facts...
(listed from oldest to newest)
Chuck Norris is the only man known to have actually kicked a habit.
Rated 3.6/5 (10 Votes)
Chuck Norris doesn't hit it and quit it, he hits it and destroys it.
Rated 4/5 (14 Votes)
Chuck Norris has the heart of the cowardly lion.
Rated 1.55/5 (20 Votes)
Chuck Norris has a tattoo that says "MOM" on his fist.
Rated 1.69/5 (13 Votes)
Chuck Norris plays bingo, with a paint ball gun.
Rated 4/5 (15 Votes)
Chuck Norris has a purple heart.
Rated 3.06/5 (16 Votes)
Chuck Norris' fortune cookie reads "whatever you say boss".
Rated 4.11/5 (18 Votes)
Chuck Norris had to breastfeed his own mom when he was born.
Rated 2.21/5 (14 Votes)
Chcuk Norris invented Flag Football so he wouldnt have to put a hurtin' on nobody.
Rated 3.86/5 (7 Votes)
Chuck Norris can not fist pump due to the catastrophic events that would occur afterword.
Rated 3.81/5 (16 Votes)
Chuck Norris refuses to buy Skittles. He tells the sky to rain and roundhouses the rainbow.
Rated 4/5 (9 Votes)
If you can't beat them, join them. Chuck Norris joins them, and then beats them.
Rated 4.11/5 (37 Votes)
The nursery rhyme London Bridges is a factual account of what happened when the English angered Chuck Norris, the ending was changed so it would be suitable for all ages.
Rated 3.07/5 (14 Votes)
Little kids look up to superheroes for protection. Super heroes look up to Chuck Norris.
Rated 3.75/5 (20 Votes)
The ancient Mayans predicted that on December, 21 2012 Chuck Norris would get angry.
Rated 3.98/5 (46 Votes)
Cars have to pull along the side of the road for ambulances, ambulances have to pull off to the side for Chuck Norris.
Rated 2.8/5 (10 Votes)
Chuck Norris edits his pictures with vi.
Rated 2.8/5 (15 Votes)
All five dentists recommend that you do exactly what Chuck Norris tells you to do.
Rated 4/5 (14 Votes)
Chuck Norris knows the secret to the Crabby Pattie Secret Formula. There is suspicion that Chuck Norris is the Crabby Pattie Secret Formula.
Rated 3.06/5 (18 Votes)
Chuck Norris can beat you in a stariring contest with his eyes closed.
Rated 3.76/5 (25 Votes)