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Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack... even a heart isnt foolish enough to attack Chuck Norris.

Rated 4.18/5 (2501 Votes)

The combination to a lock is any combination Chuck Norris wants.

Rated 3.83/5 (23 Votes)

If Chuck Norris spilled wine on his shirt, you better buy him a new one.

Rated 3.18/5 (11 Votes)

Chuck Norris can watch two movies before the previews start.

Rated 3.53/5 (15 Votes)

Chuck Norris cannot be seen on surveillance video.

Rated 3.86/5 (22 Votes)

A batter broke his bat when Chuck Norris tossed a marble at it.

Rated 3.63/5 (16 Votes)

Chuck Norris is banned from playing baseball. He only hits Home Runs.

Rated 3.24/5 (17 Votes)

Chuck Norris knows letters before A.

Rated 4/5 (21 Votes)

Chuck Norris will cause 2012.

Rated 3/5 (15 Votes)

The secret ingredient to the Krabby Patty is Chuck Norris.

Rated 2.72/5 (18 Votes)

You bought a slice of pizza. If Chuck Norris says it's a hamburger, then it's a hamburger.

Rated 3.89/5 (18 Votes)

Chuck Norris eats toothpicks as a snack between dinner and dessert.

Rated 3.2/5 (15 Votes)

After Chuck Norris turned off the bedroom light, he had 8 hours of sleep before the room got dark.

Rated 3.25/5 (16 Votes)

When Chuck Norris was a kid, he was of legal age to drink, smoke and drive.

Rated 2.79/5 (14 Votes)

Chuck Norris can play Beethoven's Piano Concerto No. 5 in E-flat major with his elbows.

Rated 3.57/5 (14 Votes)

When driving, Chuck Norris always has the right of way.

Rated 4.08/5 (52 Votes)

Chuck Norris can count 1 - 1000 and backwards in a blink of an eye.

Rated 2.44/5 (16 Votes)

If Chuck Norris starts clapping, you better start singing.

Rated 3.57/5 (23 Votes)

Chuck Norris doesn't eat cow, he eats Red Bulls.

Rated 2.67/5 (15 Votes)

Chuck Norris can fly a real plane using Flight Simulator.

Rated 4.07/5 (14 Votes)
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