Browse Through Our Collection of 5,191 Chuck Norris Jokes
Browse through our full list of Chuck Norris Facts...
(listed from oldest to newest)
Chuck Norris' earlobes are bullet proof.
Rated 3/5 (12 Votes)
Some people use Visine to moisten their eyes. Chuck Norris uses pepper spray.
Rated 3.85/5 (27 Votes)
Sharks have special protective suits they wear when Chuck Norris goes SCUBA diving.
Rated 3.88/5 (16 Votes)
Chuck Norris' breakfast consists of bald eagle eggs and tiger bacon.
Rated 3.6/5 (15 Votes)
On halloween people carve Chuck Norris' foot on their pumpkins.
Rated 3.94/5 (18 Votes)
Chuck Norris laughs in the face of Chuck Norris.
Rated 2.29/5 (14 Votes)
Chuck Norris can drop kick you sitting down.
Rated 3.07/5 (15 Votes)
Chuck Norris is so fast, Batman gets spooked out when he suddenly disappers from the room.
Rated 3.63/5 (27 Votes)
Chuck Norris can skip The Rock across water.
Rated 3.18/5 (17 Votes)
Chuck Norris does'nt drink red bull he drinks bull urine.
Rated 2.71/5 (17 Votes)
Chuck Norris doesnt poke you on facebook. he stabs you.
Rated 3.76/5 (21 Votes)
Chuck Norris is a man of his word. Any contract he signs is signed in blood......your blood for doubting his word.
Rated 3.57/5 (14 Votes)
If Chuck Norris had been in 'Jaws' it would have been called 'Dentures'.
Rated 3.65/5 (20 Votes)
The Texas state senate is considering switching from lethal injection to Chuck Norris Roundhouse.
Rated 3.26/5 (19 Votes)
Chuck Norris can break a ghosts leg.
Rated 3.92/5 (36 Votes)
James Bond is licensed to kill.......Chuck Norris is designed to kill.
Rated 3.35/5 (17 Votes)
When Chuck Norris throws a rock at night, it is known as a shooting star.
Rated 4.04/5 (49 Votes)
If Chuck Norris shoots you in the head with a gun.... You're lucky.
Rated 3.24/5 (17 Votes)
Chuck Norris doesn't have to do anything for a Klondike bar.
Rated 4.06/5 (18 Votes)
Plants tilt to the sun when they see Chuck Norris.
Rated 2.29/5 (7 Votes)