Browse Through Our Collection of 5,191 Chuck Norris Jokes
Browse through our full list of Chuck Norris Facts...
(listed from oldest to newest)
Chuck Norris has the Dos Equis guy serve him Budweiser in a dress.
Rated 4.11/5 (27 Votes)
When Chuck Norris is in Rome, they do what he does.
Rated 4.13/5 (15 Votes)
Chuck Norris is 1/8 Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a frickin Jeep.
Rated 3.4/5 (10 Votes)
Chuck Norris can create a rock so heavy that even he can't lift it. Then he lifts it just to show you who the hell Chuck Norris is.
Rated 4.06/5 (66 Votes)
If you cut off Chuck Norris' arm it will grow back...and the arm you cut off will grow another Chuck Norris.
Rated 4.11/5 (166 Votes)
Chunk Norris can rip a page out of facebook.
Rated 4.13/5 (84 Votes)
When Roald Amundsen reached the South Pole, he was greeted by the sight of Chuck Norris sipping a cup of hot chocolate while basking naked in the Antarctic sun.
Rated 4.1/5 (10 Votes)
When Sir Edmund Hillary and Tenzin Norgay reached the top of Mount Everest, they saw Chuck Norris peeing off the summit into the Pacific Ocean.
Rated 4.06/5 (36 Votes)
Chuck Norris pisses on electrified fences to feel the tingling sensation.
Rated 3.56/5 (9 Votes)
Chuck Norris' dad tried to tickle Chuck Norris when he was a baby and broke his wrist.
Rated 3.5/5 (12 Votes)
God listed Chuck Norris as his emergency contact person.
Rated 4.07/5 (15 Votes)
When a zombie apocalypse starts, Chuck Norris doesn't try to survive. The zombies do.
Rated 4.19/5 (3005 Votes)
Few people are aware that the entire lead-in of the Iron Butterfly hit "In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida" was actually recorded solely by Chuck Norris playing a piccolo.
Rated 4.11/5 (9 Votes)
Chuck Norris owns and operates a family restaurant in Waco, TX. The only item on the menu is a knuckle sandwich.
Rated 3.91/5 (99 Votes)
Chuck Norris once ate an entire rice patty, and later crapped out Mr. Miyagi.
Rated 4/5 (10 Votes)
When Eminem sung "Not Afriad" he must not of crossed Chuck Norris yet...
Rated 3.57/5 (7 Votes)
Chuck Norris is the reason why the birds are angry.
Rated 3.5/5 (8 Votes)
Chuck Norris flosses with razorwire.
Rated 3.43/5 (7 Votes)
Chuck Norris can shank you with a spoon.
Rated 3.71/5 (7 Votes)
Dry Humor is like Chuck Norris, it never gets old.
Rated 3.31/5 (13 Votes)