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Chuck Norris has taken to putting dynamite, napalm and plutoneum in his breakfast cereals in his pursuit of "Snap, Crackle and Pop".

Rated 3.79/5 (19 Votes)

Chuck Norris can powerslide a train.

Rated 3.8/5 (10 Votes)

Chuck Norris can pull handbrake turns in a boat.

Rated 3/5 (5 Votes)

Chuck Norris only allowed "The Matrix" to happen because he thought it'd be sporting to allow other people to stop bullets for a change. It wasn't.

Rated 2.86/5 (7 Votes)

Chuck Norris is the reason that rainbows are always retreating.

Rated 2.13/5 (8 Votes)

"See a penny, pick it up, all day long you'll have good luck"...unless it was Chuck Norris' penny.

Rated 3.88/5 (16 Votes)

Chuck Norris' longest attempt at holding his breath was measured on a calender.

Rated 3.88/5 (16 Votes)

Chuck Norris' toilet leads directly to a nuclear waste facility.

Rated 3.69/5 (13 Votes)

Chuck Norris has a special name for the 18th hole: Neptune.

Rated 1.94/5 (16 Votes)

Chuck Norris' favourite flavour of icecream is "Radioactive".

Rated 3.33/5 (9 Votes)

Chuck Norris likes to roast marshmallows at the Earth's core.

Rated 3.5/5 (12 Votes)

At the time when the Red Sea parted, Chuck Norris could be heard saying "A-chu".

Rated 2.44/5 (9 Votes)

Cowbells needs more Chuck Norris.

Rated 3.83/5 (12 Votes)

Chuck Norris once went to a magic show. The magician asked for a volunteer for his disappearing act. Chuck Norris raised his hand and the magician disappeared.

Rated 4.12/5 (113 Votes)

Chuck Norris recently set a land-speed record at the Bonneville Salt Flats while riding on a pogo stick.

Rated 3.94/5 (18 Votes)

Steven Seagal once invited Chuck Norris over to his house and challenged him to a game billiards. Chuck Norris easily won simply by racking Seagal's balls for him.

Rated 4/5 (24 Votes)

Chuck Norris knows the 11 herbs and spices at kfc.

Rated 3/5 (5 Votes)

Wheaties are actually sun-dried Chuck Norris boogers.

Rated 3.53/5 (19 Votes)

A snowplow once ran into Chuck Norris, the snowplow spit directly in half.

Rated 3/5 (11 Votes)

Chuck Norris earned a lifetime achievement award in just one day.

Rated 4.1/5 (79 Votes)
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