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Browse Through Our Collection of 5,191 Chuck Norris Jokes

Browse through our full list of Chuck Norris Facts...
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Chuck Norris can make a dog meow.

Rated 2.4/5 (10 Votes)

Chuck Norris collects missing socks from the dryer.

Rated 2.5/5 (10 Votes)

Every one of Chuck Norris blood cells have black belts.

Rated 3.97/5 (60 Votes)

The most grueling job in the world.......sifting through a list of Chuck Norris's daily victims to find the organ donors.

Rated 3.25/5 (8 Votes)

Chuck Norris had 3 pets. A goldfish, a lizard, and a monkey. He put his blood in each one and we now know them as Jaws, Godzilla, and King Kong.

Rated 4.04/5 (49 Votes)

Chuck Norris can win a old fashion gun duel with out turning around.

Rated 4.04/5 (23 Votes)

Chuck Norris takes sleeping pills while driving and operating machinery.

Rated 3.31/5 (13 Votes)

Chuck Norris once farted in a New York subway car. 10 seconds later, every rat in the city surrendered.

Rated 4.1/5 (10 Votes)

People set farts on fire. Chuck Norris' farts set people on fire.

Rated 3.88/5 (16 Votes)

How do the bulls prepare for the the running with the bulls?, They do the Running with Chuck Norris, those that survive do the Running with the Bulls.

Rated 3.7/5 (10 Votes)

Irony is always what Chuck Norris expects it to be.

Rated 2.75/5 (4 Votes)

Chuck Norris’s nail clippings would keep a nuclear reactor going for 10 years.

Rated 2.73/5 (11 Votes)

Chuck Norris farts Duracell Batteries, if they used them in Hybrid cars there would be no need for an engine and they would not need recharging.

Rated 2.2/5 (10 Votes)

When they asked Chuck Norris to star in the first James Bond movie – he refused and said; “I don’t need no license to kill”.

Rated 3.74/5 (23 Votes)

Chuck Norris can beat you up after school... on summer vacation.

Rated 3.62/5 (21 Votes)

Chuck Noris once found the fountain of youth. But didnt drink from it cause he was not thirsty.

Rated 3.61/5 (28 Votes)

Obama said, "Yes we can." Chuck Norris says, "I already did.".

Rated 4.1/5 (235 Votes)

Britainy Spears learned the hard way not to tell Chuck Norris to hit her one more time because he decides who to hit.

Rated 3.6/5 (15 Votes)

Chuck Norris doesn't ask, "Who's your daddy?" He already knows.

Rated 3.33/5 (15 Votes)

Chuck Norris can kill a bird by throwing it off a cliff.

Rated 4.12/5 (52 Votes)
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