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Chuck Norris can put 10 pounds of potatoes in a 5 pound sack.

Rated 4.13/5 (8 Votes)

Chuck Norris will roundhouse kick you in the back of your head while clipping his toe nails.

Rated 3.92/5 (26 Votes)

Chuck Norris went skydiving and his parachute didn't open. He returned it the next day.

Rated 4.12/5 (50 Votes)

It doesn't matter which way the compass points, if Chuck Norris points in the other direction, that's the new north!!!

Rated 3.86/5 (7 Votes)

Chuck Norris can make subsonic sounds.

Rated 3.8/5 (5 Votes)

Chuck Norris can make a Total Gym fold itself up for easy storage.

Rated 3/5 (8 Votes)

Chuck Norris doesn't need call display. He knows it's you.

Rated 2.6/5 (5 Votes)

The original actor for Rocky was Chuck Norris. But they went with Stallone because Chuck Norris doesn't need gloves.

Rated 2.75/5 (8 Votes)

Chuck Norris doesn't exercise. He does hero-bics.

Rated 2.2/5 (5 Votes)

Chuck Norris doesnt dream, he has simulations.

Rated 3.4/5 (10 Votes)

Bullies only take money to collect rent for Chuck Norris.

Rated 3.3/5 (10 Votes)

Chuck Norris can whistle words.

Rated 3.86/5 (14 Votes)

Chuck Norris doesn't lie. He simply changes the truth.

Rated 4/5 (23 Votes)

Chuck Norris can pitch a perfect game without throwing a strike.

Rated 3.11/5 (9 Votes)

Chuck Norris once fought the Six Million Dollar Man, RoboCop, and Megatron. He recycled afterwards.

Rated 4.11/5 (9 Votes)

With Chuck Norris, life and death are just words to make you feel better.

Rated 3.33/5 (6 Votes)

Chuck Norris hates Raymond.

Rated 3.66/5 (532 Votes)

Chuck Norris can inhale through his nose and mouth at the same time.

Rated 2.74/5 (47 Votes)

Kings buy Chuck Norris size beds.

Rated 4.05/5 (574 Votes)

Diamonds are formed under intense heat and pressure in the earth's crust. They are also formed in Chuck Norris's digestive tract.

Rated 1.91/5 (11 Votes)
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