Browse Through Our Collection of 5,191 Chuck Norris Jokes
Browse through our full list of Chuck Norris Facts...
(listed from oldest to newest)
Chuck Norris can put 10 pounds of potatoes in a 5 pound sack.
Rated 4/5 (7 Votes)
Chuck Norris will roundhouse kick you in the back of your head while clipping his toe nails.
Rated 4.11/5 (18 Votes)
Chuck Norris went skydiving and his parachute didn't open. He returned it the next day.
Rated 4.12/5 (50 Votes)
It doesn't matter which way the compass points, if Chuck Norris points in the other direction, that's the new north!!!
Rated 3.86/5 (7 Votes)
Chuck Norris can make subsonic sounds.
Rated 3.8/5 (5 Votes)
Chuck Norris can make a Total Gym fold itself up for easy storage.
Rated 3/5 (8 Votes)
Chuck Norris doesn't need call display. He knows it's you.
Rated 2.6/5 (5 Votes)
The original actor for Rocky was Chuck Norris. But they went with Stallone because Chuck Norris doesn't need gloves.
Rated 2.57/5 (7 Votes)
Chuck Norris doesn't exercise. He does hero-bics.
Rated 2.2/5 (5 Votes)
Chuck Norris doesnt dream, he has simulations.
Rated 3.4/5 (10 Votes)
Bullies only take money to collect rent for Chuck Norris.
Rated 3.3/5 (10 Votes)
Chuck Norris can whistle words.
Rated 3.86/5 (14 Votes)
Chuck Norris doesn't lie. He simply changes the truth.
Rated 4.08/5 (13 Votes)
Chuck Norris can pitch a perfect game without throwing a strike.
Rated 3.71/5 (7 Votes)
Chuck Norris once fought the Six Million Dollar Man, RoboCop, and Megatron. He recycled afterwards.
Rated 4.11/5 (9 Votes)
With Chuck Norris, life and death are just words to make you feel better.
Rated 3.33/5 (6 Votes)
Chuck Norris hates Raymond.
Rated 3.66/5 (531 Votes)
Chuck Norris can inhale through his nose and mouth at the same time.
Rated 2.74/5 (47 Votes)
Kings buy Chuck Norris size beds.
Rated 4.05/5 (572 Votes)
Diamonds are formed under intense heat and pressure in the earth's crust. They are also formed in Chuck Norris's digestive tract.
Rated 1.6/5 (10 Votes)