Browse Through Our Collection of 5,219 Chuck Norris Jokes
Browse through our full list of Chuck Norris Facts...
(listed from oldest to newest)
Chuck Norris walked into a bar. The bar said "ouch".
Rated 3.63/5 (130 Votes)
Chuck Norris taught Cali Swag how to Dougie.
Rated 3.5/5 (12 Votes)
Chuck Norris does bath salts to clear his head.
Rated 3.42/5 (12 Votes)
Justin bieber throws his panties at Chuck Norris.
Rated 3.42/5 (26 Votes)
Chuck Norris has championship belts in every weight class all at the same time.
Rated 4/5 (20 Votes)
Chuck Norris can pull a hat out of a rabbit.
Rated 4.12/5 (65 Votes)
Chuck Norris cuts his grass with ninja throwing stars.
Rated 3.75/5 (12 Votes)
Chuck Norris never fails, he tells success to come back when its ready for him.
Rated 3.91/5 (165 Votes)
Chuck Norris can turn water into beer.
Rated 2.93/5 (15 Votes)
Chuck Norris abducts Aliens.
Rated 3.87/5 (79 Votes)
Chuck Norris survived 2 abortion attempts.
Rated 3.47/5 (19 Votes)
Chuck Norris routinely kicks 50 yard field goals, barefooted, using a cement block.
Rated 4.04/5 (23 Votes)
Shooting stars are simply vapor trails left by a Chuck Norris roundhouse.
Rated 3.73/5 (95 Votes)
Thunder is caused by Chuck Norris rubbing the stubble on his chin.
Rated 3.98/5 (470 Votes)
Chuck Norris once gave a man the Hiemlich Manuever. That man still holds the record for most bones broken.
Rated 3.87/5 (452 Votes)
Someone once asked Chuck Norris how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie role center of a tootsie pop? Chuck then pulled out his gun and shot the tootsie pop and answered "0".
Rated 4.08/5 (37 Votes)
When Chuck Norris was a freshman in High School, 7 seniors took him Snipe hunting in the woods. He killed 19 Snipes, a grizzly bear and 3 timber wolves. Oddly, the 7 seniors are still missing.
Rated 4.09/5 (69 Votes)
Chuck Norris doesn't run red lights he never runs.
Rated 3.08/5 (25 Votes)
Chuck Norris does not throw grenades, he Chucks them.
Rated 3.18/5 (39 Votes)
When Chuck Norris says an opinion it turns in to a fact.
Rated 3.64/5 (28 Votes)