Browse Through Our Collection of 5,191 Chuck Norris Jokes
Browse through our full list of Chuck Norris Facts...
(listed from oldest to newest)
Chuck Norris helped Picasso with his art by roundhouse kicking every
single one of his paintings.
Rated 2.89/5 (18 Votes)
Chuck Norris can find factors for prime numbers.
Rated 3.28/5 (32 Votes)
Calculus was invented when Chuck roundhouse kicked Algebra 2.
Rated 2.77/5 (22 Votes)
There are no sides in sports when Chuck Norris plays. He could score
in the opposing team's goal, but he'd get the points.
Chuck Norris CAN win an argument with the referree.
Rated 2/5 (16 Votes)
Chuck doesn't run up to the basket to dunk. The basket comes to Chuck.
Rated 2.5/5 (24 Votes)
Chuck Norris doesn't abuse steriods. Steriods abuse Chuck Norris.
Rated 2.08/5 (24 Votes)
When you have a pen that doesn't seem to work, give it to Chuck Norris.
He can make it work.
Rated 2.53/5 (32 Votes)
Chuck Norris's face is on a bill worth well over a billion dollars.
However, there's only one of these bills in the entire world, and Chuck has it in his wallet.
Rated 2.43/5 (23 Votes)
When a tree falls in a forest and noone's around to hear it, does it make a noise?
I dunno, go ask Chuck. He'll know. He was there.
Rated 2.58/5 (19 Votes)
Chuck Norris can give a fullpowered roundhouse kick in skinny jeans.
Rated 2.57/5 (23 Votes)
Chuck Norris invented fire.
Everytime you get burned, that's Chuck's way of reminding you.
Rated 3.14/5 (28 Votes)
A secret character is unlockable in Super Smash Brothers Brawl, only
if you played enough times as Chuck Norris has, which frankly, noone could
ever do. The character is Chuck Norris, and all its attacks incorporate
roundhouse kicks which results in insant KOs.
Rated 2.86/5 (29 Votes)
Chuck Norris's lightsaber is his own leg.
Rated 2.07/5 (29 Votes)
Chuck No-*CRASH* *SCREAMS OF PAIN*... *silence*
(next door down)
Rated 3.1/5 (29 Votes)
Pink is the new black only if Chuck Norris wears it.
Rated 2.56/5 (18 Votes)
Chuck Norris CAN throw a bird off a building, and kill it.
Rated 3.33/5 (24 Votes)
Chuck Norris puts lemonhalves over his eyes before going to bed everynight.
Rated 2.47/5 (30 Votes)
There are no Weapons of Mass Destruction in Iraq.
Chuck Norris lives in Oklahoma.
Rated 3.86/5 (29 Votes)
The thing you'll see after Chuck Norris sees you.
Rated 2.96/5 (26 Votes)
When Chuck Norris is the QB he is also the wide receiver.
Rated 3.08/5 (26 Votes)