Browse Through Our Collection of 5,191 Chuck Norris Jokes
Browse through our full list of Chuck Norris Facts...
(listed from oldest to newest)
Every morning Chuck Norris has a bowl of nails for breakfast, without any milk.
Rated 2.94/5 (35 Votes)
Chuck Norris doesn't give money to the IRS. The IRS gives money to Chuck Norris.
Rated 3.05/5 (19 Votes)
Chuck Norris doesn't use a remote control. He gives his TV orders. And it obeys.
Rated 3.21/5 (29 Votes)
Chuck Norris can draw a triangle with four angles.
Rated 3.77/5 (30 Votes)
Chuck Norris can row a boat with his finger. And get a good 50 miles from it before he has to row again.
Rated 2.48/5 (25 Votes)
Chuck Norris has built in Wi-Fi.
Rated 3.11/5 (28 Votes)
It's a bird! It's a plane! No, it's Chuck Norris!
Rated 2.71/5 (28 Votes)
Chuck Norris can smell the color nine.
Rated 3.62/5 (26 Votes)
At buger king you can have it your way, Chuck Norris goes to Mc Donalds... he STILL gets it his way.
Rated 2.92/5 (25 Votes)
Ever see halo's master-chief without his helmet? its Chuck Norris,
and if you saw him and your alive, you are a lucky person...
Rated 2.67/5 (27 Votes)
No one touches Chuck Norris's ass except for the toilet paper.
Rated 3.43/5 (35 Votes)
When Chuck Norris cuts himself shaving the razor bleeds.
Rated 4.07/5 (28 Votes)
Chuck Norris can kill your imaginary friends.
Rated 4.18/5 (4409 Votes)
The great pryamids are a result of Chuck Norris snezzing in the desert.
Rated 2.44/5 (25 Votes)
Chuck Norris sees dead people... everyone.
Rated 3.04/5 (24 Votes)
Chuck Norris can bend light.
Rated 3.5/5 (30 Votes)
Jellyfish use to have bones. Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked one in the face and the bones dissapeared. The rest soon followed.
Rated 2.65/5 (17 Votes)
It was once theorized the Titanic struck Chuck Norris.
Rated 2.47/5 (17 Votes)
Chuck Norris runs faster than light.
Rated 2/5 (23 Votes)
Mr. T once lost an arm wrestling match with a Chuck Norris poster.
Rated 3.38/5 (40 Votes)