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After much debate, president Truman used the atomic bomb on Hiroshima in WWII rather than sending Chuck Norris in. It was the 'humane' thing to do!

Rated 3.86/5 (21 Votes)

Chuck Norris once rode a bull through a china shop. The only thing that broke was the bull.

Rated 3.92/5 (25 Votes)

Chuck Norris CAN drive fifty five.

Rated 2.54/5 (13 Votes)

Chuck Norris dosent get hit by cars, cars get hit by Chuck Norris.

Rated 3.39/5 (18 Votes)

Chuck Norris doesn't "keep it real." Reality keeps itself Chuck Norris.

Rated 3.6/5 (15 Votes)

Chuck Norris first words were, "I'm going to roundhouse kick you in the face."

Rated 2.88/5 (17 Votes)

Chuck Norris doesn't shop at Wal-Mart. Wal-Mart shops at Chuck Norris.

Rated 1.57/5 (23 Votes)

Three simple rules of survival: 1. Donít take the name of Chuck in vain 2. When in the presence of Chuck, avert your eyes, lest you recieve a roundhouse kick to the face 3. When camping, bring toilet paper.

Rated 2.21/5 (19 Votes)

After eating Rice Krispies cereal, Chuck Norris craps out firecrackers.

Rated 2.5/5 (14 Votes)

The last person who made eye contact with Chuck Norris was Stevie Wonder.

Rated 3.82/5 (22 Votes)

The reason Chihuaha's look scared at all times is because they live in the same world Chuck Norris lives.

Rated 2.89/5 (19 Votes)

Chuck Norris is more explosive than a missle.

Rated 1.93/5 (15 Votes)

Chuck Norris drew a straight line and manged to make it a closed figure.

Rated 3.5/5 (18 Votes)

The day Chuck Norris goes to hell is the day hell freeze's over.

Rated 3.33/5 (21 Votes)

Chuck Norris doesn't need a paint brush to paint. All he needs to do is wipe his hand on the wall.

Rated 1.92/5 (12 Votes)

They say tough men eat nails for breakfast. Chuck Norris does his grocery shopping at Home Depot.

Rated 3/5 (23 Votes)

Round here we use Chuck Norris toliet paper. It's rough, tough, and takes crap from no one.

Rated 3.53/5 (15 Votes)

Chuck Norris' beard is the only thing stopping his chin from kicking some ass.

Rated 3.75/5 (20 Votes)

Chuck Norris is the only human to defeat Forrest Gump in a game of ping pong.

Rated 3.56/5 (16 Votes)

Chuck Norris is never the weakest link. It's whoever he wants to roundhouse kick next.

Rated 3.23/5 (13 Votes)
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