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Chuck Norris is always late to work, not because Chuck Norris forgets to set his alarm. Its that his alarm is afraid to make him up.

Rated 3.33/5 (15 Votes)

Chuck Norris loves animals.... For breakfest.

Rated 3.24/5 (17 Votes)

Chuck Norris gives Freddy Kruger nightmares.

Rated 3.78/5 (32 Votes)

Chuck Norris can beat you to death with a cloud.

Rated 3.67/5 (27 Votes)

An anagram for Chuck Norris is: Rich Rock Sun. These are answers to the three most Google searched questions about Chuck Norris: Is Chuck Norris rich or poor? What is Chuck Norris' penis made of? What is the energy equivalent to a Chuck Norris round-house kick?

Rated 2.95/5 (21 Votes)

Chuck Norris can give you THREE black eyes.

Rated 4.04/5 (135 Votes)

In Lord of the Rings, they orginally had Chuck Norris take the role of Frodo. But Chuck Norris just crushed the ring in his hand then ate it... It would have made for a boring movie.

Rated 3.83/5 (18 Votes)

You can tune a piano, but Chuck Norris can tune-a-fish.

Rated 2.44/5 (16 Votes)

Pluto looked at Chuck Norris the wrong way. That is why it isn't a planet any more.

Rated 3.52/5 (21 Votes)

Chuck Norris doesn't fight for his right to party, he parties for his right to fight.

Rated 3.68/5 (22 Votes)

Chuck Norris once smoked a cigarette, and the cigarette died of Chuck Cancer.

Rated 4.13/5 (168 Votes)

Roller coasters take a ride on Chuck Norris.

Rated 3.25/5 (16 Votes)

Chuck Norris round housed kicked his cat into a dog.

Rated 3.93/5 (40 Votes)

Someone once splashed Chuck Norris so Chuck Norris splashed him back... Tidal Wave.

Rated 3.87/5 (23 Votes)

Heat tracking Missles track away from Chuck Norris.

Rated 2.56/5 (18 Votes)

Some little kids like trying to burn ants on the side walk with a magnifying glass on hot Summer days. Chuck Norris likes trying to burn little kids on the sidewalk with his eyes on hot summer days.

Rated 3.23/5 (26 Votes)

The reason the Energizer bunny keeps going is because Chuck Norris is chasing it.

Rated 3.57/5 (23 Votes)

Chuck Norris can beat you in arm wrestling with no arms.

Rated 3.64/5 (22 Votes)

Chuck Norris gave his fire brain freeze.

Rated 2.29/5 (14 Votes)

Mona Lisa wonders why Chuck Norris seems to always staring at her.

Rated 3.57/5 (21 Votes)
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