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Browse Through Our Collection of 5,191 Chuck Norris Jokes

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Chuck Norris has found a needle in every haystack.

Rated 4.15/5 (34 Votes)

There is no such thing as fearless. Everyone fears Chuck Norris.

Rated 4.09/5 (22 Votes)

Despite the song in aristocats Chuck Norris DOES NOT want to be a cat.

Rated 3.35/5 (17 Votes)

Chuck Norris could speak before he was born.

Rated 3.67/5 (21 Votes)

Chuck Norris came before the chicken AND the egg.

Rated 4.06/5 (33 Votes)

When Chuck Norris looks at you, you look at your grave.

Rated 3.88/5 (25 Votes)

Chuck Norris's round house kicks don't kill you, they completely wipe your existence from the space time continuum.

Rated 3.94/5 (16 Votes)

Lactose is Chuck Norris intolerant.

Rated 3.81/5 (21 Votes)

Chuck Norris doesnt pick up hookers they pick Chuck Norris up.

Rated 2.71/5 (14 Votes)

When Chuck Norris was born he thought the doctor was a terrorists and strangled him with his umbilical cord.

Rated 3.89/5 (36 Votes)

The world doesn't revolve around the sun, it revolves around Chuck Norris.

Rated 3.27/5 (26 Votes)

Chuck Norris uses tear gas for air freshener.

Rated 4.03/5 (58 Votes)

Chuck Norris can lay eggs.

Rated 1.55/5 (29 Votes)

Chuck Norris once walked into a sauna. The sauna couldn't take the heat.

Rated 3.86/5 (63 Votes)

Cats cough up hair balls. Chuck Norris coughs up cats.

Rated 3.62/5 (29 Votes)

Chuck Norris cuts paper by sticking his fingers out in a V and moving them up and down.

Rated 2.76/5 (25 Votes)

When Chuck Norris plays Rock Paper scissor shoot. His rock bashes through the paper, his scissors will cut your rock and his paper will give your scissors a paper cut.

Rated 4.09/5 (23 Votes)

Chuck Norris fills his car by pissing into the gas tank.

Rated 3.43/5 (23 Votes)

Outlets fear the day Chuck Norris sticks his finger into them.

Rated 3.47/5 (15 Votes)

You're not on the computer reading these jokes, or even your phone. You're on Chuck Norris.

Rated 1.67/5 (18 Votes)
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