Chuck Norris plays Whack-a-Mole with his feet.

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

When Chuck Norris gets shot, the bullet doesn't pierce Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris gets Pierce Brosnan.

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

Chuck Norris can flick some one off with 3 fingers.

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

The Loch Ness monster is actually Chuck Norris going for a swim.

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

When life gives Chuck Norris lemons he makes grape juice.

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

Chuck Norris has never combed his hair...it surrenders everyday.

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

If Chuck Norris were a Mormon, he wouldn't have to wear a nametag.

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

The Pope confesses to Chuck Norris.

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

If Chuck Norris was the CEO of Nike, they'd have to change their slogan to "Already Did It.".

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

Banana peels slip on Chuck Norris.

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

Chuck Norris can breathe in space.

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

Tough men eat nails. Chuck Norris does all his grocery shopping at Home Depot.

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

When confronted by Venom from Marvel comics Chuck Norris simply said a word and Venom decided to eat his own life force.

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

1+1=CHUCK NORRIS!

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

While Watching Captain Planet Chuck Norris heard Captain Planet say "The power is yours!"; after that Chuck Norris jumped into the tv and roundhouse kicked him several times and said "The Power is Mine!".

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

The only reason cats have nine lives is because Chuck Norris wanted a challenge; it only gave the cats more time to be afraid of Chuck Norris!

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

Chuck Norris can stare at the sun.

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

Chuck Norris doesn't know the meaning of pain, just all the reasons for it!

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

Chuck Norris will tear you out the frame AND the boxspring!

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

Chuck Norris has an I.Q of 200, if you don"t believe him ask his fist!

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

Chuck Norris is Big Brother!

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

Chuck Norris can knock you into next week!

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

When going to a concert with Chuck Norris, every section is the nosebleed section!

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

When Chuck Norris snaps his fingers some random person in the world dies.

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

When Chuck Norris jumped into the ocean he didn't get wet the ocean got dry.

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

Chuck Norris can take 13 apples from a basket full of apples.

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

Chuck Norris can kill ants with a magnifying glass. . . at night.

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

You might be a redneck if Chuck Norris says so.

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

Chuck Norris can find the needle in the haystack.

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

Chuck Norris' smile once brought a puppy back to life.

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

They wanted to put Chuck Norris' head on Mt. Rushmore, but the granite wasn't strong enough to hold up his beard.

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

Chuck Norris gives the sun cancer.

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

Chuck Norris has a turbo diesel. On his bicycle.

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

Chuck Norris established the People's Republic of Chuck Norris.

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

Chuck Norris' bones are made of adamantine.

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

Chuck Norris once stole a man's heart -- the only time he was ever glad to give something back that he took.

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

One day a man told Chuck that two heads are better then one. So he took that man and another man and roundhouse kicked them together to make the first Siamese twins.

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

Chuck Norris had a party and invited celebrities. Tom Cruise cannot get in, because Chuck Norris does not take shit.

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

SIGN UP NOW for our FREE weekly Chuck Norris Jokes email!

First Name:

Your email address:

Enter the code:

Copyright 2008 linkpress.info
Sitemap | About | Contact Us | RSS Feed